Long Distance Lovin' | Lessons and Things I've Learned

Monday, July 31, 2017

I am currently in a long-distance relationship.

My boyfriend Cody is currently a student, and he is also a student assistant football coach. During the school year, he's 4 hours away. 

Having to adjust to this distance after being just 20 minutes apart was certainly not easy, but we have done it before: the "talking" phase of our relationship took place long-distance before the summer started. But it doesn't make the miles feel any shorter when we are apart. I miss being with him and having constant adventures together during the week. But, when we're long distance, we've made it work, and it's made us stronger as a couple.

So, what have I learned? What advice would I give to a couple literally going the distance?

The first day apart/the day you leave is always the saddest. It is absolutely okay to miss your significant other like crazy the moment you're apart. Goodness, the day my boyfriend left to go back to school was hard. But I promise that it gets a little easier after that dreaded goodbye. But for now, ride those feelings out. It's okay to feel sad that they're gone. 

Stay busy. My boyfriend and I are both busy people; I write and publish stories and blog while he coaches. Staying busy helps you cope with the distance, and it gives you tons to talk about when you do talk during the day or night. Speaking of talking...

Communication is key. Everywhere you look for long distance relationship advice, you will hear this, and I'll be seconding all the blogs and Pinterest boards to the letter. You have to stay in contact somehow, some way while you're apart if you want to make a long distance relationship work. You have to voice your concerns, give all the compliments and encouragement, rant about the day's stresses and frustrations, and just talk. Tell your significant other all about your day, and tell them how proud you are of their chasing their dreams. Talk out your disagreements. Just do it all over phone calls, Skype (which is the biggest blessing in an LDR in my opinion), letters and gifts, and social media as often as you can, or as part of a routine you two establish. Just do it. You need it while apart. 

Strengthen each other spiritually while long-distance. I love the She Reads Truth app and devotionals. I love that there's also the guy's counterpart, He Reads Truth. During our first month together, I told Cody about a devotional book that I figured would pique his interest; it involved great American hymns (he loves music and is involved with song-leading at our church). So, being the awesome boyfriend he is, he surprised me and ordered a set for us to read. I am so, so grateful that he cares for me in this way, and I'm grateful that I get to grow closer to God with him.

Trust each other. This is absolutely paramount when your relationship spans great miles. Remember, your significant other loves you, and that's why they're in this with you. When you love each other, trust each other, and maintain open lines of communication, you two will be unstoppable.

Finally, you will cherish the time you are together so much more. I appreciate the days I spend with Cody consecutively so, so much. And I know without a shadow of a doubt that he's worth waiting for.  

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